Dream|Reality

June 3rd; a trick of the light and it draws you higher

Dream: A feeling of a large conference room, the impression of many people coming and going. Then, there was a flash, and I was standing on a plain, The Plain, with grass thigh-deep on me. The sun was setting, the wind was rippling along. A sense of someone standing close to me, gently speaking to me in a sad voice. i couldn't understand the words, but I understood the tone. Another flash, and i was underneath the Aurora Bridge, leaping from girder to girder in the dark. There were boats passing beneath me...and then I was falling. I tore right out of the dream at that and woke, sitting up and sweating.

The Moment CD:Chorus, Erasure Book: A Plague of Angels, Sherri S. Tepper Outside:sunny, sunny, SUNNY, and me STUCK inside. there is no justice. Doing: getting my act together Link: Random Monty Python Skit Server! Horoscope: " Take some responsibility for your output and take steps to renew (and add to) your skills. Plus, the results you desire will seem nearer when you delight more in the process."   {{previous}} | {{next}} archives | reads | home   "Psychic celebration look up at the stars and see Venus rising rapture, fascination you live for the light and your own desire Blind vision, blind faith you really can't rely on what they tell you for effect It's just not within the scheme of things to give up your life so easily that's not the way you're meant to be what a waste of time and energy" Erasure, "Joan"

Reality: Oh, funny. Shannon's been reading my site. (I *heart* access logs. Heh.) 58 hits last week from his machine out at work. I figured I wasn't significant enough any more to warrant attention. Always amusing to know that words and actions don't necessarily match. I'm currently in a much better mood than i was. It took a bit (and a couple of people yelling at me), but I think I'm finally upright again, though i'm not sure in which direction to bobble. This month should be interesting, to say the least. Music for today is Erasure's Joan, which is kind of like a theme song for the other half of my life, the half where i'm skating on the surface of the frozen oceans of reality. I'm currently bouncing between normal and high, which is probably only because I've not slept well for a long time, and I'm tired. Way tired. It seems to weird to me that when I'm actually taking care of myself, not drinking, eating well, being kind to my body, is when I get totally exhausted and burnt out. I tried to read Following Smoke yesterday. I didn't get very far. something in my brain just stopped me...I suppose I'm not ready to revisit it, yet. It's sort of funny, now that I think about it, how it could be seen as my documentation of the end of my relationship. It's raining men. I need an umbrella! Oh, not really. I've just had three guys in the last week either imply or say directly that they would like it if I would date them. *sighs* and I adore all of them....but, man! What timing! Every time I decide that I really want to quit dating men, this happens. I don't think i'm going to end up with any of them. After all, they all live far away, and I don't do LDR's. And I really think, this time around, i'm going to stay away from guys. I mean, really. They're not good for me, i'm not good for them, and I just don't want to, any more. Then again, who knows what will happen... But I am single, and, darnit, it's time I stayed this way for a little while. No LDR's, no guys, no serious commitments. Muah. And this vacation coming up, in which I plan on doing most of the things that I haven't done in a year and a half. It's a good life!

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